Hubs has been working out of town and I have been Mom-Solo. (possible relation to Hans)Thus, leaving me with little relief or the mindset to blog.
This week, I tried Tony Horton. Again. Did something with 'plyo' in the name (part of the P90X series, I don't wanna go downstairs to find it). It was so good! Lots of jumping. I laid in the floor for the last 20 mins, like I do every time I try to do one of those workouts.
This blog post will be random due to my undiagnosed A.D.D.
In other unrelated news, my Mom came for a visit this weekend. She and the "Pea" came up and stayed for a few days. My kids went crazy over the dog (they want one soooo bad). I decided last year that it would be 2011 before we try again. The big two fought over 'Sweet Pea' and W couldn't relax around him. There was a lot of scolding and redirecting.
Mom was here to see Tater's recital. Grammy, Nana, Aunt Shell, and Damon came to watch her. Although T was a tad nervous, she pulled herself together and danced beautifully. No sign of nerves or fear. She was excellent. We were all so proud! After the show, I asked her what she did to calm down. She said she asked God to help her. That a girl, Bisc~
I have somehow (even though I live here) forgotten all the projects I have left to do. The lower half of my dining room needs to be painted. The banquette is still a dream. My seed packets for my herb garden are in my junk drawer. The bird feeder needs to be refilled. I will get to them.
We school through the summer, so that and W's sensory diet take up a good bit of time.
OH.The laundry. It's like the movie 'Gremlins.' Maybe it ate after midnight and multiplied. I don't know what's up with it. I do laundry everyday and don't see the bottoms of the hampers.
I'm considering implementing some classical methods into our homeschool. Buying "The Well Trained Mind" is on my to-do list. W wants to start Kindergarten now, so I'm planning to start with him in June after VBS.
This weekend, we are going to picnic at the park with friends. Thoughts of fried chicken and all things high carb are on my brain. Maybe I'll replace the potato salad with coleslaw so that I'll have less guilt and bloating. Wink, wink.One of my friends got her first bikini wax this week. Been there, done that. That story is for women only. And apparently she's not going back either...
I consider having my nose pierced quite regularly. I have an inner punk. Maybe it will happen. My friends opinions are mixed. Can't really say why I haven't done it yet. Except when I'm preggers, I don't want anything sparkly in my widened nose. If I do it, I'll show you.
Speaking of preggers, I found out in March that I was expecting. I was about five weeks, but just didn't feel peace about sharing it. I didn't tell my dearest friends for a week or so, and we didn't tell our families. After my first blood test, the dr's office asked me to come back because my progesterone level was high. They wanted to check it again to see if there was more than one baby. So, I had the second test. The results showed that my HCG level wasn't doubling. It should have been if it was a healthy pregnancy.
They told me that it probably wasn't viable. Instead of finding out how many, we found out that we'd likely miscarry. That was difficult. I cried a lot that first day. And then the next day, I didn't feel like I was pregnant anymore. I began to really doubt that the baby would survive. My symptoms faded. It was depressing. I prayed a lot and knew that it was in His control. That didn't diminish the pain and disappointment.
After a couple of blah days, I decided to have hope until the dr told me that there wasn't any. Even though I didn't feel pregnant anymore, I knew that God could do anything. Blood work that week and a sonogram confirmed that we would miscarry. So then I had to wait.
It was consuming. They told me all the signs and symptoms. I just had to wait. Waited for a week. Then it finally started and that was another week. Those days were long, but they really aided in my healing. As I look back, we only had that first week to dream. Think about how we'd tell our children. How we'd tell our family. Changes that we'd need to make to have a nursery. It was only a week. But in that week I had a million thoughts. I even bought maternity spanx...not knowing that I wouldn't need them.
Thank you to all our friends that prayed for us. It was such a blessing to have the support and encouragement.
Shane and I have learned so much through all of this and are grateful for the lessons. Our hearts were broken, but they are better now. I wouldn't say healed, but definitely healing. It has made heaven a little sweeter to me. Some have mentioned the "why?" and to me it doesn't matter. I'm not looking for that answer. God is in control and His plan is perfect. Even when it hurts. When we are open and surrendered to Him, then we are open to loss. And He is with us through everything.
Talk to you soon~
And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, and to those who are called according to his purpose.
Romans 8:28
Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him;
Psalm 37:7
Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
Matthew 5:4
Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-17
My flesh and my heart fail;
But God is the strength of my heart and my portion.
Psalm 73:26
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
And God will wipe every tear away from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.
Revelation 21:4
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